The road trip has officially begun on this Sunday evening. We met at five o’clock tonight to go over the game plan for Monday, then we had dinner at Anita’s. Time is winding down toward nite-nite.
Tu mereces ser feliz! Mereces ser amado, mimado y querido. Comprendido, escuchado y protegido.
As predicted, my in-box is full. Told you so!
The swingers story aired last night (if you missed it I’m attaching a link to my archive page ). Well, let me tell you my friends… this morning I was somewhat afraid to log in to my e-mail!
A controversial story like this is quite a challenge because no matter what you do…someone is going to be mad. My goal is to always be fair and tell the story through the eyes of the people I interview. In this case, I interviewed two couples (who were both very nice by the way. A lot of people have asked me about them). I wanted to give them a platform to express their points of view. Isn’t that a positive thing? Talking? Even if we don’t agree, I think public discourse is always good.
I also interviewed a psychotherapist and a marriage counselor. The counselor, Ina Mlekush ( www.spiritualsexuality.com) has been doing this for 20 years. She was a very pleasant, open minded person. I have come to appreciate talking to people who are open minded (and non-judgmental). As a reporter, I have interviewed hundreds of people over the years. The most frustrating thing for me is talking to someone who is myopic and sees the world ONLY through their eyes and experiences. Ina is quite the opposite and I appreciate that.
At any rate, she told me that the divorce rate now lingers somewhere around 80%. I have to say, I was shocked when she said this. I thought the divorce rate was somewhere around 55%. Ina sent me a follow up e-mail to clarify her statistic and I am posting this information for everyone to see. Also, I’m posting an e-mail I received from a woman named Chrissy. She took issue with some of the things that were said in my stories. Again, that’s the beauty of public discourse. We can talk. Or at least that’s my hope.
Below is the additional information from Ina:
In www.divorcemag.com it is stated 80% of divorces are irreconcilable
differences.
In 1997 43 % of marriages end up in divorce
First marriages 50% end up in divorce
Remarriages 60% end up in divorce
There were:
116, 3000 divorces in 1997
2,500,000 divorces in 2002
115% Increase in Divorce from 1997 TO 2002
Not having the exact the numbers of marriages in 2007…………………
I deduced from these figures that we are at an 80% divorce rate.
Now here’s the e-mail from Chrissy:
I appreciate the open mind you appear to have towards those you
interviewed, and towards the Lifestyle.
With all due respect, I think it needs to be addressed and corrected,
that a “fact” has been inaccurately stated (twice for emphasis!) by an
“expert”. “Do you realize 80 percent of all marriages end in divorce?
Eighty percent.” (already at least 2 viewers have quoted the 80% as a
fact already – there is no way to guess how many thousands of people who
watched this now believe that 80% in marriages end in divorce)
Would you care to let me know the reason my comments have not been posted?
Thank you again for not presenting swingers as psychotic sexaholics.
Chrissy
So my son Taylor and me, after visiting two colleges in two days (Illinois and Georgia Tech) had a couple of hours before our flight home from Atlanta Tuesday afternoon. We decide to surprise our buddy Howie McCann, who runs a baseball training facility north of Atlanta, and visit him unannounced
Okay so I’m working on this story about suburban swingers and it’s got people talking. Talking and blogging and sending me e-mails. Lots of e-mails!
It’s a controversial topic that cuts to the heart of a morality debate. It also raises a lot of questions about the state of marriage in today’s society. One marriage counselor I talked to said 80% of marriages fail. 80%! Why? She said it has a lot to do with sex and intimacy.
I interviewed several so-called swingers. And I have to tell you, I was surprised. These couples were not at all what I expected. I don’t know what I expected, really. I guess I thought we would show up to find a really hairy guy with lots of gold chains waving us in to his love palace. Nope. Not even close.
The couples we talked to were all well put together, successful professionals. And they all have one thing in common: monogamy is not for them.
One of the men I interviewed says he is madly in love with his wife. Yet he says it doesn’t bother him at all when she is intimate with another man during one of their get togethers. In fact, he says it brings them closer together and adds “spice” to their marriage, thus keeping it strong.
He also told me that, in his opionion, this lifestyle is about individuality and being open minded. In his words (and this is a direct quote), “We don’t have individuals anymore. We have cookie cutter everything: houses, clothes, mentalities. Somebody comes out and tries to be an individual and it’s like, ‘oh no we gotta lock them up’.
I’m not a hopeless romantic, but in many ways I guess I am pretty old fashioned about love and family. While this lifestyle is not for me, I didn’t walk away offended. If these are all consenting adults who aren’t hurting anyone? Well? I don’t know.
This story defintitely leaves you with a lot to think about: marriage, monogamy, love and individuality. It airs Thursday night at 5:00. And I expect by 5:15 my in-box will be full.
March 31, 2007 – a day I will never forget (and my husband better not, either)!
So I went to a wedding in Cleveland over the weekend. I know you’re probably thinking, Cleveland’s not “back East.” But to an Arizona girl who’s never lived anywhere further than Colorado … it’s the Far East!
A chance to take a chance. It’s all most people really want. And maybe those who’ve been denied too many chances want it even more.
To all the wonderful people who waited in line… a long line at times… for autographs from 3TV on-air personality… thank you!
I believe I’m speaking on behalf of my co-workers when I say.. we appreciate you! It means a lot to us that you watch… that you care… and that you share that with us.. on the few occasions we have to sit and chat with you *in person!* I was out there on Saturday from 2 oh-clock on… and I met some of the sweetest people…. their kids.. their grand-kids… and it sure was a pleasure!
Thank you for allowing us to come into your homes.. your gyms… your places of business each morning/noon/ night during the week and the weekend! Thank you for sharing with us your likes/dislikes…I look forward to meeting more of you next year! 
Kirsten
I hear it almost everyday. It’s true, I do have a great job, traveling our wonderful state, looking for beautiful spots and interesting characters to put on our 3TV’s Good Evening Arizona.
It’s that time of year again. You know, when the temperatures finally dip down below 100, sometimes even into the 90’s. it’s called October and in the high country, the weather is beautiful.
Face it, most of us here in our fair state are from some place else…many from spots in the country where there’re these tall things, called “trees” with green things, known as “leaves” sticking out of them.
Almost every spring, I’m blessed to do a report on a wonderful place called Canaan in the Desert.
Just south of Shea Blvd. on 40th street in Phoenix, this peaceful garden focuses on the crucifixion story. Trails through lush desert plants lead to different stations where stone carvings reveal the last days of Jesus.
This is the time of year to take to the trails, and those trails are right here in the valley.
Mighty mussels are invading our beloved rivers and lakes. What can you do about it? So just what am I talking about?